ALERT...ALERT...In this post I am discussing THE BOOK, Fifty Shades of Grey. Although I will NOT be revealing the ending, or any of the plot, I will just be discussing how I feel about the the main characters, Christian and Ana. So if you are reading this book or will be reading it you may not want to read this post although I am not going to reveal anything.
As you have heard, this book has a lot of sex in it, and it is pretty essential to the character's relationship. The only thing that I'm going to say about it is that it wore me out. As far as I am concerned to each his own, whatever people want to do in the privacy of their own bedroom, between consenting adutlts, more power to you. I just know that some of it would have put me in traction.
The most disturbing thing to me was the relationship between Christian and Ana. Ana is always worried that she has made Christian mad. Is Christian mad? I hope he's not mad? He's going to be mad at me? I hate when he's mad, and on and on and on. She is continuously wringing her hands, knotting her fingers in her lap, not telling him how she really feels about things, never asking him about all the secrets he keeps.
He never wanted her to go out with her friends, have men friends, or even to work. When she was away from him, there was constant phone calls and emails about where she was, who she was with and of course he would be mad and she would be worried about him being mad. It seems she was always having to ask his permission to do anything or go anywhere. Even though she had a strong personality, she always followed his wishes, his instructions, his rules.
Now I know that some of his ways were due to trauma suffered in his childhood, but it just made me crazy. I wanted to just yell at her "for God's sake, grow a spine and say what you mean and quit worrying about him getting mad!!!!". He really didn't like for her to go anywhere without him, so he could protect her. Now there was a point in the story that she needed protection, but he was like that before that event happened.
I wonder if young women or women who are low on self esteem would take this type of relationship as the norm? This is a very popular book, would they think this is how a relationship works. Will they think that they always have to bend to their partners will? Will they think they can't express their opinion, have friends of their own, go out without their partners?
You may think that I didn't like the book, but I did. I read all three books and it really did have a good plot to it and the story is much more than what I discussed here. I just discussed one part of it that bothered me.
I would recommend it for others to read, but............FOR GOD'S SAKE STOP WRINGING YOUR HANDS AND SPEAK UP!!!!
Kathy
Friday, July 27, 2012
Sunday, July 15, 2012
Odds and Ends II
1. What is it with people anymore. You can't say anything to anybody, even if it is off the cuff or just venting frustrations about a situation, without them running back and telling on you. This has happened to me several times in the last few weeks. I state my opinion and BAM, next thing I know I'm getting a phone call. I vent my frustrations about a situation and someone feels the need to run their mouth and let everyone know what I'm upset about, then BAM, I getting a phone call or text. I vent about an incident that happens to someone who is not even involved and I tell them that I am just venting and not going to pursue it, then BAM, someone comes up to me and asks if I have a problem. I've had it with this crap. From now on I am going to be very careful who I confide in, keep my opinions to myself even if asked, and only unburden myself to a close circle of friends.
2. I lost a $6800 check this week. It was an insurance check that I received a couple of weeks ago for hail damage that I received. I always put all my mail, bills, correspondence, checkbook and junk mail on the kitchen table throughout the week and then I ususlly go through it over the weekend. I put the check in that pile until I could get to the bank and deposit it. Well, last Friday I went to get it so I could go to the bank and I couldn't find it. For the last three days I have torn my house apart looking for it. I've looked in my paid bill stubs, my shred pile, my purse, I even took a weeks worth of garbage from outside and torn open the bags looking for it. I even went into my office on the off chance that I had it in my purse and dropped it there. Nothing, nada, zero. The only thing I could that I could think of that happened was when I was tearing up my junk mail I must have tore up the check by accident.
I knew I had to call the adjuster this afternoon to let her know what happend and find out what happens now. I hadn't slept well for the last couple of nights and was sick to my stomach this morning just thinking about making this phone call. Would there be an investigation, would I have to send a notarized statement, would she give me a hard time? As it turned out, she was very understanding. She will put a stop on the check tomorrow morning and issue me a new one and send it right away. Simple, easy, done. Thank you Jesus. I need a better system for my mail.
3. On a lighter note, I have had the most fun on Facebook than I have had in a long time. One of our local TV stations has been pulled off the air due to a dispute between the station, cable company and the big wig owners. I don't pretend to understand any of it. But the big wig corporate types have been giving us a feed from a CBS affiliate in upstate New York. I started kind of watching their news and it was interesting to see the local news in another city. Then I stumbled onto a local Facebook page dedicated to us who enjoy watching this New York newscast. We make tongue in cheek comments about the news stories, there is lots of good natured sarcasm and we are just having a blast. I love sarcasm and my sense of humor has a sarcastic bent to it. We all try to get on FB when the newscast starts and we comment through the whole thing. It's all in good fun and I can't wait til the next newscast. We have even caught the attention of that station in New York and they have given us a few shoutouts. Lovin' it!! I will be so disappointed when the dispute ends and we lose our northern feed but for now we keep on rockin'
4. I thought my dog was going to choke to death today. We were just sitting on the porch and she started coughing and kind of hacking. It just keep getting worse and then she was struggling to catch her breath. Next thing I know her legs are giving out and she starts to go down all the while coughing and heaving. Scared the bejeezus out of me. I stick my fingers down her throat thinking she might have someting in her mouth, no. I'm smacking her on the back, no help, and then I squeeze her middle and she starts to calm down some. After a minute or so, but it seems a lot longer, she finally starts breathing better and calming down. I don't know if anything I did helped her or if she calmed herself down. She didn't have anything in her mouth to choke on so I don't know what happened but it was definitely a scary moment.
Thank goodness tomorrow is the start of a new week and hopefully a much smoother week. But I will keep my opinion about that to myself.
Kathy
2. I lost a $6800 check this week. It was an insurance check that I received a couple of weeks ago for hail damage that I received. I always put all my mail, bills, correspondence, checkbook and junk mail on the kitchen table throughout the week and then I ususlly go through it over the weekend. I put the check in that pile until I could get to the bank and deposit it. Well, last Friday I went to get it so I could go to the bank and I couldn't find it. For the last three days I have torn my house apart looking for it. I've looked in my paid bill stubs, my shred pile, my purse, I even took a weeks worth of garbage from outside and torn open the bags looking for it. I even went into my office on the off chance that I had it in my purse and dropped it there. Nothing, nada, zero. The only thing I could that I could think of that happened was when I was tearing up my junk mail I must have tore up the check by accident.
I knew I had to call the adjuster this afternoon to let her know what happend and find out what happens now. I hadn't slept well for the last couple of nights and was sick to my stomach this morning just thinking about making this phone call. Would there be an investigation, would I have to send a notarized statement, would she give me a hard time? As it turned out, she was very understanding. She will put a stop on the check tomorrow morning and issue me a new one and send it right away. Simple, easy, done. Thank you Jesus. I need a better system for my mail.
3. On a lighter note, I have had the most fun on Facebook than I have had in a long time. One of our local TV stations has been pulled off the air due to a dispute between the station, cable company and the big wig owners. I don't pretend to understand any of it. But the big wig corporate types have been giving us a feed from a CBS affiliate in upstate New York. I started kind of watching their news and it was interesting to see the local news in another city. Then I stumbled onto a local Facebook page dedicated to us who enjoy watching this New York newscast. We make tongue in cheek comments about the news stories, there is lots of good natured sarcasm and we are just having a blast. I love sarcasm and my sense of humor has a sarcastic bent to it. We all try to get on FB when the newscast starts and we comment through the whole thing. It's all in good fun and I can't wait til the next newscast. We have even caught the attention of that station in New York and they have given us a few shoutouts. Lovin' it!! I will be so disappointed when the dispute ends and we lose our northern feed but for now we keep on rockin'
4. I thought my dog was going to choke to death today. We were just sitting on the porch and she started coughing and kind of hacking. It just keep getting worse and then she was struggling to catch her breath. Next thing I know her legs are giving out and she starts to go down all the while coughing and heaving. Scared the bejeezus out of me. I stick my fingers down her throat thinking she might have someting in her mouth, no. I'm smacking her on the back, no help, and then I squeeze her middle and she starts to calm down some. After a minute or so, but it seems a lot longer, she finally starts breathing better and calming down. I don't know if anything I did helped her or if she calmed herself down. She didn't have anything in her mouth to choke on so I don't know what happened but it was definitely a scary moment.
Thank goodness tomorrow is the start of a new week and hopefully a much smoother week. But I will keep my opinion about that to myself.
Kathy
Sunday, July 1, 2012
My Gifts From Heaven (conclusion)
During this time he had choking spells in which he would almost swallow his tongue. So the doctor put a thread through the tip of Kevin's tongue and tied the end of the thread to a small pair of scissors. This was to keep his tongue pulled forward so it wouldn't fall back into his throat. Poor Kevin! He cried so much. He must have been in great pain. I prayed that if it was his time to die that he would be taken quickly so he wouldn't have to suffer so long.
During this stay in the hospital the doctor asked my permission to perform a gastronomy on Kevin. This was a process where a rubber tube was placed in the abdomen and about eight inches of the tube protrudes outward and this had a metal clip on the end to keep it closed. When he was fed the clip was removed and the liquid food was poured into the tube, then the clip was replaced. This process took about ten minutes to feed him compared to the two hours it previously took him to eat. I was in favor of the operation because it would save a great deal of time and also Kevin was getting thin from lack of nourishment.
We visited Kevin everyday. Finally the news came that he was ready to come home. A visiting nurse came to the house to teach me how to feed him through the tube. It didn't take long to learn the technique. I suddenly had to much time to spare. Only ten minutes to feed Kevin, and Janie was feeding herself by this time.
Kevin was hospitalized so often that the nurses remembered him from one time to the next. He was there every nine to ten months.
Several months later, on a Halloween night, Kevin was rushed to the hospital again. This time for an appendectomy. It burst before the operation began. It was doubtful if he would pull through. Kevin must have a strong constitution to recover from all the serious illnesses he has had.
Mom stayed with me during the operation. John didn't want to come. A change was taking place with John. He didn't want to visit with Kevin anymore. He would come to the hospital with me, but he would either stay out in the hall or downstairs. The more often Kevin was hospitalized, the further John and I drifted apart.
Now after all our tragedies, our marriage was falling apart. John started drinking heavily and staying away from home for days at a time. How could he do this to me? After all, I'm human too. I was hurt and depressed by all our troubles, but you can't give in to them. You have to pick up the pieces and begin again.
Then in March 1961, John deserted me. Our marriage lasted ten years. We were married young. I had been seventeen and he was twenty. We had had the whole world to look forward to and now it was all over. The only thing that kept me going for the next few months was the fact that I was four months pregnant.
Sonny was born a few months later. He was normal and healthy. I thought after the baby came that John would come back home, but he didn't.
During this time I started taking Kevin to a private chiropractor. The medical doctor could do nothing more for him. He was still having numerous epileptic seizures every day and he was totally disabled due to the fact that he had cerebral palsy along with epilepsy.
Kevin couldn't hold his head up very well and had no use of his arms and legs. He had four years of chiropractic care and during this time his health improved drastically. Not one time in these four years has Kevin had any serious illnesses, compared to being hospitalized every few months before chiropractic care.
After a few years, my doctor advised me to take Kevin to Children's Chiropractic Center. This clinic is free for those who can't afford private treatments.
When we started, Kevin was given thorough examinations, a blood test, numerous x-rays and a cardiogram. All these were given before the treatment's began.
After he was given the first adjustment, there was a slight change in Kevin's seizures. Then after a few more adjustments, his seizures cut down to about twenty a day compared to one hundred or so previously. Since this time, Kevin's neck has become stronger so he can hold his head up better and he moves his right arm around, whereas before he never used it. For the first time I now have some hope for him.
During these few months of going to the clinic, several times weekly, I have become acquainted with a very wonderful doctor. She had not only helped Kevin physically, but has become a much needed friend and a great inspiration to me. She has encouraged me to look at things more positively, something which I have not been able to do these last few years, alone.
She advised me to set a goal and let nothing enter to distract me from that goal.
If I work at this and have faith, many wonderful things can happen.
THE END
UPDATE:
John never returned to his family and never helped support them and because of that they had to go on welfare. He rarely ever saw his two youngest children. He died around 1970 in a workplace accident.
His wife is alive and doing well, along with his two youngest children who now have children of their own.
Kevin passed away around 1994, he made some improvements over the years, though not many but was still totally diabled and he continued to be cared for at home by his mother.
It also amazes me how far medical care has come since that time, and how maybe some of these disabilities may have been treated somewhat differently.
As I said at the beginning of this story, I did not write it and I copied it exactly like it was given to me, although I did change the names for privacy reasons. To me, it is a story of courage, love and strength.
KATHY
During this stay in the hospital the doctor asked my permission to perform a gastronomy on Kevin. This was a process where a rubber tube was placed in the abdomen and about eight inches of the tube protrudes outward and this had a metal clip on the end to keep it closed. When he was fed the clip was removed and the liquid food was poured into the tube, then the clip was replaced. This process took about ten minutes to feed him compared to the two hours it previously took him to eat. I was in favor of the operation because it would save a great deal of time and also Kevin was getting thin from lack of nourishment.
We visited Kevin everyday. Finally the news came that he was ready to come home. A visiting nurse came to the house to teach me how to feed him through the tube. It didn't take long to learn the technique. I suddenly had to much time to spare. Only ten minutes to feed Kevin, and Janie was feeding herself by this time.
Kevin was hospitalized so often that the nurses remembered him from one time to the next. He was there every nine to ten months.
Several months later, on a Halloween night, Kevin was rushed to the hospital again. This time for an appendectomy. It burst before the operation began. It was doubtful if he would pull through. Kevin must have a strong constitution to recover from all the serious illnesses he has had.
Mom stayed with me during the operation. John didn't want to come. A change was taking place with John. He didn't want to visit with Kevin anymore. He would come to the hospital with me, but he would either stay out in the hall or downstairs. The more often Kevin was hospitalized, the further John and I drifted apart.
Now after all our tragedies, our marriage was falling apart. John started drinking heavily and staying away from home for days at a time. How could he do this to me? After all, I'm human too. I was hurt and depressed by all our troubles, but you can't give in to them. You have to pick up the pieces and begin again.
Then in March 1961, John deserted me. Our marriage lasted ten years. We were married young. I had been seventeen and he was twenty. We had had the whole world to look forward to and now it was all over. The only thing that kept me going for the next few months was the fact that I was four months pregnant.
Sonny was born a few months later. He was normal and healthy. I thought after the baby came that John would come back home, but he didn't.
During this time I started taking Kevin to a private chiropractor. The medical doctor could do nothing more for him. He was still having numerous epileptic seizures every day and he was totally disabled due to the fact that he had cerebral palsy along with epilepsy.
Kevin couldn't hold his head up very well and had no use of his arms and legs. He had four years of chiropractic care and during this time his health improved drastically. Not one time in these four years has Kevin had any serious illnesses, compared to being hospitalized every few months before chiropractic care.
After a few years, my doctor advised me to take Kevin to Children's Chiropractic Center. This clinic is free for those who can't afford private treatments.
When we started, Kevin was given thorough examinations, a blood test, numerous x-rays and a cardiogram. All these were given before the treatment's began.
After he was given the first adjustment, there was a slight change in Kevin's seizures. Then after a few more adjustments, his seizures cut down to about twenty a day compared to one hundred or so previously. Since this time, Kevin's neck has become stronger so he can hold his head up better and he moves his right arm around, whereas before he never used it. For the first time I now have some hope for him.
During these few months of going to the clinic, several times weekly, I have become acquainted with a very wonderful doctor. She had not only helped Kevin physically, but has become a much needed friend and a great inspiration to me. She has encouraged me to look at things more positively, something which I have not been able to do these last few years, alone.
She advised me to set a goal and let nothing enter to distract me from that goal.
If I work at this and have faith, many wonderful things can happen.
THE END
UPDATE:
John never returned to his family and never helped support them and because of that they had to go on welfare. He rarely ever saw his two youngest children. He died around 1970 in a workplace accident.
His wife is alive and doing well, along with his two youngest children who now have children of their own.
Kevin passed away around 1994, he made some improvements over the years, though not many but was still totally diabled and he continued to be cared for at home by his mother.
It also amazes me how far medical care has come since that time, and how maybe some of these disabilities may have been treated somewhat differently.
As I said at the beginning of this story, I did not write it and I copied it exactly like it was given to me, although I did change the names for privacy reasons. To me, it is a story of courage, love and strength.
KATHY
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